are you a dream come true?
are you a dream come true
like the ageless mist
with its hue?
you are the wind that keeps me moving
the force that guides me to know…
that it will all be ok
no matter what.
close your eyes now
remember the time when
i last whispered in your ear
and held you tight.
remember me that way.
that way, only.
it is how i remember you.
© r.e.l. 1/21/11
Image of ‘her place’ by melanie crawford
Posted for Poetry Potluck week 19 (rules, regulations, laws) on Jingle Poetry
We
old souls
we
old friends
still
in this light whisper
still
old souls.
franco sastre
January 21, 2011 at 12:55 pm
always old souls…
January 21, 2011 at 2:01 pm
I love your lines: “remember me that way. / that way, only.” They really give this strange almost desperate sense of need, yet the rest of the poem seems more a want. It is a great contrast. Really enjoyed this one.
January 22, 2011 at 10:51 am
i’m glad you noticed the contrast. i always try to create that in my poems with mood or change in voice…
January 22, 2011 at 10:53 am
I simply loved it..
January 22, 2011 at 5:39 pm
i’m happy. thanks for commenting..
January 22, 2011 at 7:14 pm
“the force that guides me to know…
that it will all be ok
no matter what.”
what a blessing that must be, just like your poetry is.
Heather
January 23, 2011 at 6:08 pm
true in the force
January 23, 2011 at 6:55 pm
Aww..this is so true…
At the end of the end, it’s all about perception, and how OUR MINDS decide to remember things.. no?
LOVED the way you’ve written this one..
January 23, 2011 at 6:12 pm
thank you… it’s so true. to remember the best in people who meant the world to us…
January 23, 2011 at 7:07 pm
Such an endearing write.
January 23, 2011 at 6:14 pm
thank you. it meant a lot to me to write.
January 23, 2011 at 7:08 pm
This is a sweet loving piece, thank you!
January 23, 2011 at 6:16 pm
much appreciated…
January 23, 2011 at 7:10 pm
pure and simple beauty in few words. like it …
here is mine Potluck http://scentofmyheart.wordpress.com/2011/01/23/standing-tall/
January 23, 2011 at 7:09 pm
yes, simple and pure
January 23, 2011 at 7:13 pm
Love the first stanza – so beautifully romantic
January 23, 2011 at 7:10 pm
you know when you first encounter something that seems too good to be true, but is true.. it’s like you’re in dream. there is a mist
January 23, 2011 at 7:16 pm
“like the ageless mist
with its hue?” Very powerful.
January 23, 2011 at 7:16 pm
when there is a mystery, i imagine a mist of green ..
January 23, 2011 at 7:39 pm
very apt words.
profound piece.
A++
January 23, 2011 at 7:34 pm
thanks, jingle…
January 23, 2011 at 7:37 pm
Remember that last precious moment when time stood still? I enjoyed the way only the best moment is held tightly, not any wrongs.
January 23, 2011 at 7:45 pm
it’s honestly true. it’s what i remember most. not the bad or ugly. it’s the one last beautiful moment…
January 23, 2011 at 7:52 pm
This poem is quite as dear as the person whom you obviously cherish. Well done. I especailly like this one. It resonates.
January 23, 2011 at 8:23 pm
yes, and always will cherish… glad it resonates. it’s very pure
January 23, 2011 at 8:33 pm
Something about remembering one last moment before kinetic energy between two people dissipates seems both hopeful and mournful at the same time. Tough feat to accomplish with so few words. You have a wonderful poetic voice. Always wonderful to find something like this amidst the detritus of a Sunday night. Great post!
crb.
January 23, 2011 at 9:31 pm
thank you for your kindness… i try to portray the more subtle feelings with few words. i’m glad it touched you..
January 24, 2011 at 6:43 am
INTERESTING AND LOVELY. HONESTLY, I BUY THIS IDEA OF YOURS. WOAH
January 23, 2011 at 11:06 pm
January 24, 2011 at 6:43 am
Beautiful words to keep a beautiful memory…
January 23, 2011 at 11:37 pm
yes, a beautiful memory
January 24, 2011 at 6:43 am
Beautiful in its fragility Robin, nice twist and change of mood. Thanks for sharing
January 24, 2011 at 1:17 am
love is fragile, yes…
January 24, 2011 at 6:44 am
This is so beautiful and magical! Moved me deeply… Almost crying! Thanks for sharing…
January 24, 2011 at 3:40 am
… me too. tears create beautiful words, don’t they
January 24, 2011 at 6:44 am
Lovely poem..we all wish to be remembered in our special way..you brought this out so well…
January 24, 2011 at 6:56 am
thanks .. yes we do
January 24, 2011 at 7:06 am
impressive and light! here’s my potluck for this week: http://fiveloaf.wordpress.com/2010/08/04/here-for-you/
January 24, 2011 at 8:14 am
thanks… your comments mean a lot
January 24, 2011 at 11:41 am
So very romantic, Robin!
(And yes, in fact, I AM a dream come true… or was that a nightmare? LOL!)
January 24, 2011 at 9:51 am
January 24, 2011 at 11:44 am
I stand to be corrected, but I felt as though there were two voices in the poem. If so, you brought it out brilliantly.
It is also a very comforting poem… nostalgic.
I loved it.
January 24, 2011 at 12:27 pm
absolutely… i try to speak with two voices often in my writing
glad you enjoyed…
January 24, 2011 at 2:46 pm
I could feel the arms wrapped around me…
Beautifully sweet. Lovely!
January 24, 2011 at 2:01 pm
i’m glad…
January 24, 2011 at 2:55 pm
Lovely. I especially like the line “you are the wind that keeps me moving.” The movement part…being propelled and compelled. Sometimes that is what we need. And resting against that support. Yummy.
~Cloaked Monk
http://cloakedmonk.com/2011/01/23/eternity/
January 25, 2011 at 3:04 pm
yes, wind is mysterious… in all its forms. thanks for your comments….
January 25, 2011 at 6:18 pm
I just loved this piece… reminded me of a time in my life when just being beside a particular soul was sufficient enough.
January 26, 2011 at 3:41 am
yes, just being beside a particular soul is sufficient enough
thanks for that comment
January 26, 2011 at 6:23 am
Oh, I’m swooning! Your words make me feel like my husband’s whispering sweet nothings in my ear! I love, love, love this!
January 28, 2011 at 4:27 am
perfect
January 28, 2011 at 6:58 am
beautiful beyond petty words. your poems truly are magical.
February 12, 2011 at 5:15 am
thank you.. i try to find the magic..
February 12, 2011 at 8:11 am