but your attention
the way you used to be
© r.e.l. 4/10/11
image “Golden Brown” by Mayou
posted for Poetry Potluck 4/10-4/17/11 on Jingle Poetry
can i face you, ghost
and know everything
that what isn’t said
but is masked instead in a mist…
its chosen way
when you feel you see me
a side of me, you follow
gone like mist, maybe sleeping
proudly to you
and for you
© r.e.l. 3/15/11
posted for Poetry Potluck 3/27-4/2 on Jingle Poetry
featured in Feminine Intent on redbubble
You know that the answers are in your dark sides that you probably refuse to see. Did you know that yoga has the potential to be the place to confront what’s most deep inside you? This means, however, that you have the power to confront your darkest side of you in your yoga practice.
It’s a place only for the bold, that is for sure… But ask yourself,
“what are you scared of?”
It is true that we hide our darkest parts deep within our bodies. The best parts stay locked up in our joints and tightest places: hips, necks, shoulders, backs, and even feet. When moving through yoga with deep breath, these gems–these secrets–can become free…
Unlocked, their messages trace through our blood as the prana moves relentlessly through us in a vibrant yoga practice. It is the best kept secret.
As these parts of you move through you, and you encounter your difficulties, you can embrace them as gifts. To visit them and set them free, is truly a gift. An angel.
If you do not, these dark secrets stay below (inside your underworld), unconsciously controlling you. They cause you to repeat ugly patterns as “a fly mindlessly beating itself to a pulp bumping against a window through which it cannot pass…attempting to escape its misery,” as put by Absolute Palaver.
Don’t be scared. You have the power. It is you that you are unlocking. The true you.
© r.e.l. 12/30/10
Photo by Matin Demiralay of Turkey — firstname.lastname@example.org
With the cooler fall weather arriving and Halloween around the corner, I am reminded of masks. I’m not thinking of costumes though in this moment, but of the idea underneath. It is during these masquerade parties that we can play with the idea of hiding our identity and being another side of our psyche.
But, how many people actually hide behind a mask, although invisible, all the time? It can be a negative idea. Interestingly enough though, there is an art to living a balanced, healthy masquerade life.
Some of us are an open book, while others gravitate toward being a mystery to others. I myself prefer to a be a mystery, taking it slow as the self unwinds.
Anticipation grows, as do deeper feelings, as attempts are made to solve the mystery. I find it painful (in an interesting and humorous way) to watch others project all of their own views on what they need me to be — filling in the gaps of the unknown — when not much is revealed. Is the human need to connect with a blank slate really real? Yes. In noticing this phenomena, along with the slowness I enjoy to relationship unfolding, I take much comfort in observing this.
For, they are the ones putting the mask on me, and not the other way around. I am invincible and perfect, or I am quite the opposite if they have some unconscious darkness to clear, whom they need to love with all of their hate and can only do it while looking into a fictitious mirror called Me.
Don’t get me wrong, it is wonderful to be put on such a pedestal sometimes; in fact, this image can even have the power to manifest into a truth if I really believe it. Hmmm…. maybe I should take these facades more seriously…
I’m not saying that I don’t do it too. For, I do. It is a fulfilling way to make the fantasy and dream come true! For sure.
But removing the mask, which often entails an entire body armor of mind, body and soul, is best. To see the true person as they are…
But, do it slowly as the best stuff does not show its truth when rushed.
chi va piano va sano va lontano
(who goes slowly, goes healthy)
© r.e.l. 10/20/10
So what does wholeness look like to me? I thought this summary I played with recently was a wonderful way to describe my view on this subject. For it is when I am depicting all of these words at once, as taken from my personal blog I write here (generated by a tool called Wordle), that I feel most whole.
I can get a cue as to what I avoid in life, in my search for wholeness, if I watch what it is I try to withhold to others in my conversations. These are my truths which I run from and hide even from myself, as I lack confidence to orate them. The fear is controlled by my unconscious. These are the inner truths that point to my fear of being who I truly am, as Neil Legault quotes:
Catch yourself trying to avoid telling someone your truth about yourself and you will see how you hide yourself from life. This is the pointer that shows you your fear of being who you truly are.
I seek to bring myself into wholeness by merging my mind with my spiritual beliefs. The two act aside each other naturally, and when the dark clouds come, I have to work diligently in meditation to remember the sun is always shining above it — something greater than me.
© r.e.l. 10/10/10
Continuing on from coming into wholeness… I want to talk about the unconscious. It is here that we are driven. The largest part of our psyche is the unconscious, in the same way that most of an iceberg is actually underwater. A lot of the unconscious is the “shadow,” according to Jung.
The art of “letting go” is the way we drop our worries and pinpointed desires from our minds so that they no longer control us. All that we try to let go, all the activity in our minds that over-thinks, all the agitation, and all that keeps us from reaching our dreams is sourced here in the unconscious.
It is normally not so simple to overcome. If we are not able to express ourselves from the core of who we are because we feel uncomfortable doing so, and we are not sure why, it’s because we are blocked.
Dreams are a wonderful way to access our unconscious. Dream interpretation is a way to talk to this “person” who is dreaming. To enter into any sort of dialog with the dream, regardless of the philosophy, is a step toward unleashing the material from your unconscious mind and allowing it to settle in the conscious mind.
Once this unconscious material is freed, regardless of your method, you will most likely feel a range of emotions from elation to discomfort. Don’t be alarmed by this, as it will pass quickly :) It is all part of the process of moving the energy…
The unconscious can be reached in deep meditation too, even as meditation-in-motion in a strong yoga asana practice which leads to mental and emotional stillness. The trick is to stay focused on the right meditative tools so that you can train your mind to observe unconsciously as the energy unfolds while you are awake. It can be confusing while awake to determine which is conscious and which is unconscious, so this requires pure stillness in your mind in order to access it.
Alternatively, some people are able to enter into a dialog with their child self.
You can be sure that whatever is most important to you will come up in a dream or deep meditation! Figuring this out is the key. It is sometimes not easy (or impossible) to remember dreams. Setting an intention before sleeping, as well as creating a special dream log book with a flashlight is a start to getting in the groove of remembering. As you give attention to your dreams, you will more easily remember them and all the details.
Interpreting the unconscious, whether in nighttime dreams or in meditation, can be fun as you learn your symbolism. It is fun to bounce the ideas off others too. However, all symbols are yours alone. Even though people have created symbolism dictionaries, the symbolism to each person is unique in its own way. [Although if you read one of these dictionaries, you will take on some of the symbolism!] Once you have determined your own, it is fun figure out!
Even if you have a conscious recognition of unconscious material that feels disturbing, this can change completely if you figure out the source behind it all. Once you do so, you will feel the shift on an emotional level!
All reaction is unconscious. If you are conscious, you never react; you act. Action is conscious; reaction is unconscious.
~ Osho ~
© r.e.l. 9/23/10