my voice as it describes you

heart_Bizarre del Bizarrio:Flickrcome to me with your confidence
and all
that you know i want.

you don’t expect me to be someone i’m not,
because you know i am vulnerable, right?

you can see the tenderness in
the reality of my defenseless heart.

i like my voice as it describes you to me

…and now, i have something i need to tell you

in person.

don’t ask me to show you what it’s like to lose a beautiful heart,
mine.
don’t let me go another day before i tell you i love you.

© r.e.l. 1/2/15

Won Perfect Poet Award in Thursday Poets Rally week 79 with Hyde Park Poetry

baldeagle+perfect+poets+at+hyde+park+poetry+palace+rally+week+79

confidence in me
inching toward you breath by breath
i miss you today

© r.e.l. 1/29/15

I nominate Sina Saberi

 

tell me why, as we sat on a bench

image: daniel marquardt

you loved me.

i dare you to do it again, like the waves that crashed into our scene, unannounced.

we were sitting on a bench as the bus came by.

we didn’t take it.

we were there instead.

inside ourselves, building us.

 

tell me why we keep that memory a secret

from our days today, alive and awake

with present words and thoughts and senses…

tell me why that day goes unnoticed now,

the day we knew that you were a part of me…

 

© r.e.l. 11/9/14

 

image: Daniel Marquardt (Heart Nebula)

you float as i know you

floating_candles

in the days when i loved you more than i loved myself
i floated, like light, above water, above myself

to a dream that is hard to forget
(i never forgot)
words that were dying to be shared
as hearts, sacred
opened up to melt onto the floor

together to protect each other, to protect themselves
voices whispered
tears of the past, of the present, of the future broke
presence that would live on and become patience

© r.e.l. 11/1/14

all at once, rebellious

chaos_2sometimes i think i like chaos too much.

i can hide in it.

it’s like the chaos of a coffee shop, while concentrating.

i like to watch it build up, so that i have it, so that i can swim in it.

it soothes me to know its presence–its opposite of order.

it is rebellious, yet a container to work within, to be all things.

all at once.

it is also a puzzle, a trail to follow, to connect dots, to follow the rope on my way out.

it is me, my chaos.

© r.e.l. 10/24/14

a memoir of a special time

trees_pisaencapsulating every inch, touching.

i imagine how your hands clasp mine.

we are a bravery that led to senses.

of understanding whispers, or of character in windows of time.

of future times, slowly with deep eyes.

like beautiful surrender wrapped up, frozen…

follow me to my heart that risks. vulnerable, slow down, slower. testing the dream, flames shift.

where your hands are a metaphor for your heart waiting for strength and a voice, waiting to begin and not end. to feel safe and live inside me to tell me your beautiful words.

 

© r.e.l. 9/28/14

 

 

little voice

Screen Shot 2014-09-24 at 1.36.18 PM

dear little voice inside, you can have whatever you want. you choose.
your way is beautiful, its protection and opening, on cue according to rhythms and instincts. you are alive and i hear you pulse. i feel you hide and then come out with wide eyes and inviting heart. it’s perfect to shine when you do, and not because others fly by your serenity, or wish to light your fire. be you.

© r.e.l. 9/24/14

do you know?

IMG_3422-0.JPGdo you know that i will lay my strength beside you and surrender?

do you know that i have it in me to wonder if it can be brave enough for you?

do you remember
that i miss you?

do you know that my smile was always for you? it was hidden at the bottom of me.

do you believe that i am typing these words just for you?

do you know that i dreamed i was wrapped in you last night?

do you ever think of my shadows or yours when you brush against me?

do you remember our silent moments that connected us despite our lack of patience?

do you believe that your eyes melted me each time then and still do?

© r.e.l. 9/14/14

dear precious tears

girl_rain
who are you, precious life?

stay with me in your presence
that breathes even when it doesn’t try.
you see the potential that i don’t see in myself.
you cry sometimes
and prefer to hide…
surrounded by pillows, no one can see your face,
your weakness,
and you don’t have to be something you’re not,
something you feel others expect.

dear precious tears,
it’s ok
because you only come when your heart is shining
transferring all the opposite into you.
your water is not fear or anger
but freedom.
you are expression of desire met
beyond imagination, by your side.
you are delight at being enough
to be intimate
to be wanted.
you allow me to know that my space is safe
and you know what you need to say
when no one else is listening.

you are my gift.

© r.e.l. 9/3/14

Submitted to Thursday Poet Rally week 79 with Jingle Poetry

that which rises

echo_ocean3

you are that which rises.

and you know me to be the one who senses you now, a reprise.

did you know that i heard you last night when you spoke to me with your eyes?

you were the ocean then, yet not.

you were an ironic metaphor with clarity,

the kind that floats by unnoticed, hides in corners, or drops to the floor.

you were that which you cannot comprehend, even to yourself.

 

© r.e.l. 8/29/14

for someone special

show me why

stinson beachshow me why i feel as i do now.

that i know between your thoughts
is a search for the same
as me,
you pulled my arms around you closer
when i lived in the past seconds.

that you are
bouncing back at me, a reflection
this feeling looking for me
when you saw me smile before you,
and knew as you dashed off
that my seconds would remain, ingrained in you.

that without you
i would still be spinning in my mind
day after day
intentions full and alive
but closed up
to wait another day
to see something that makes me different
when you spoke while drowning in your words
and i heard.

that as the days go by
my dreams lead me toward you
not because of me
but because of you
and who you are.

show me why
i have made the choice
to traverse the edge of crazy
to chose you.
to love you.

 

© r.e.l. 4/14/14

submitted to Thursday Poets Rally week 80 on Hype Park Poetry Palace

submitted to The Poetic Bond IIII 7/12/14

image: Stinson Beach from Mt. Tam (credits: r.e.l.)

posted on Micropoetry 6/13/14 for #reflection theme

posted on Medium 4/14/14

 

even more than i imagined

seed
i’m scared to really look it in the eye
(what i really want)
because i don’t think i can have it.

i can’t keep it.

and what have i done wrong to make it so that this is so?
i’m covering my heart and drowning instead.
i want my experience to hold me
because i can’t hold myself in this way.

in my dream, the seed that is planted makes me special.
i’m ready for it.
then it’s gone when i open my eyes.
then i want it back even more than imagined i did.

 

© r.e.l. 7/16/14

 

 

a simple question

heart_broke

what i really want to say

is too real

that you are more

than i can imagine ever knowing

all of.

why is it so hard to ask you

a simple question,

the only question i have?

i miss you when the time passes

and i’m scared of being left alone

with only my words.

i want to be the answer

you’ve searched for.

 

© r.e.l. 7/8/14

 

Posted (partial) on Micropoetry 8/15/14 for #heart theme

in my search

growing
i know deep down
that only the right thing
is happening to me.

i speak now to you,
my dream,
my core desire,
my distraction,
which will tie us together in a balanced state.

in my search, i have been sad
because of the inability to find
the part of you that is me.

but now i have it
when i can see your face in the present,
in person,
i am not worrying.

you tell me not to fade away,
to rest
and so i do.

© r.e.l. 4/23/14

Posted (partial) on Micropoetry 8/22/14 for #search theme

the look in your eye

by simeon schatzyou know how sometimes
the stars have a mind
of their own
as they move on their way
to find the best way
to mix with the look in your eye?

in your eyes
i see
the same

© r.e.l. 2/27/11

posted for Poetry Potluck week 24 (2/27-3/5/11)

featured in FREEDOM IN WORDS & ART on redbubble

shared on Ethereal Heights

posted (partial) on Micropoetry

posted on Medium

submitted to The Poetic Bond IIII  7/12/14

image © simeon schatz

i want to sit back in our dream

i want to sit back in our dream
in our chairs in the sun one afternoon
and just know we did it, the right thing.

when i finally said the right words
when you finally felt soothed and knew you could not return
to the life you once knew, nevermore.

when you finally said it right this time
you convinced me
your mind spoke, while drowning
and then it smiled, while crying
somehow getting through to me, it worked.

with me from that moment on
when i was there for you and you for me
in those moments when you heard my words
the time you looked in my eyes, pulled my arms around you closer.

you are the bright side of forever
a feeling that had been looking for me
it saw who i was
and sent me to you.

i had you
you saw me smile before you dashed off
knowing that my seconds would remain ingrained in your brain.

© r.e.l. 3/2/14

 

Submitted to the POETRY magazine

as if hidden, you are this

bluetreeI am hidden. Are you? As if to be hidden behind words that speak illusively, at all times, bouncing off buildings and walls. I shoot an arrow and it comes back to me. Some day.

Who are you anyway? Are you the words or are they merely what comes out when trying to speak? There is no time to leave important words unsaid. I speak of eloquence.

Inspirational times with comic undertones spark a tune in another. Sometimes. But, truly, it’s all for you. You who deserve to be timeless and unforgotten. You are where my eyes open to receive what I’m waking up to now. I am here now because you were there and smiled and felt.

Create. Create all you can be. Be creative. Be daring. Be you. I will walk with you, and you will walk with me. But don’t forget to be balanced, be calm and be all that you should be behind the eyes of you. Don’t tell anyone if you falter.

My calling is you, an obligation to fulfill. You are what begs to flow from me, knowing what to make of it along the way, unsuspecting. You occupy the space between sentences, between thoughts that hang and then drop.

You are my arrow I shot long ago. It came back to me with its secret. It told me with its fire: be the you that wakes up in the morning, still groggy, remembering what exactly went on the hours before while dreaming.

Your image burned in my brain fills me with the opposite of order that I need. I let you build up so that I can understand you better. You give me the power to say No. You allow my creative—my unknown—to surge, to cascade. You are endless and you are real. You make me want to write a story, phenomenal, of us. As a river raging knows my name with impatience trickling, in an instant I am known. Finally.

But it’s just me here now writing… and, all I have are my verses wondering how to get through to you. I seem to be writing as if from a distant land when I realize that life without you isn’t possible. I want to stay there in this moment forever. You are the river that I once swam up, I swim again. Stay with me, you whisper.

© r.e.l. 7/17/13

Published on Rebelle Society  5.10.14

[This is Behind the eyes of a writer™: A series, part fourteen. Continuing on from a dedication, part thirteen in Behind the eyes of a writer™ series, I tear you apart in pieces to unglue what you’ve become. Part fifteen in my Behind the eyes of a writer™ series is next]