are you a dream come true
like the ageless mist
with its hue?
you are the wind that keeps me moving
the force that guides me to know…
that it will all be ok
no matter what.
close your eyes now
remember the time when
i last whispered in your ear
and held you tight.
remember me that way.
that way, only.
it is how i remember you.
© r.e.l. 1/21/11
Image of ‘her place’ by melanie crawford
Posted for Poetry Potluck week 19 (rules, regulations, laws) on Jingle Poetry
We
old souls
we
old friends
still
in this light whisper
still
old souls.
franco sastre
always old souls… 😉
I love your lines: “remember me that way. / that way, only.” They really give this strange almost desperate sense of need, yet the rest of the poem seems more a want. It is a great contrast. Really enjoyed this one.
i’m glad you noticed the contrast. i always try to create that in my poems with mood or change in voice… 😉
I simply loved it..
i’m happy. thanks for commenting..
“the force that guides me to know…
that it will all be ok
no matter what.”
what a blessing that must be, just like your poetry is.
😉
Heather
true in the force 🙂
Aww..this is so true…
At the end of the end, it’s all about perception, and how OUR MINDS decide to remember things.. no?
LOVED the way you’ve written this one..
thank you… it’s so true. to remember the best in people who meant the world to us…
Such an endearing write.
thank you. it meant a lot to me to write.
This is a sweet loving piece, thank you!
much appreciated…
pure and simple beauty in few words. like it …
here is mine Potluck http://scentofmyheart.wordpress.com/2011/01/23/standing-tall/
yes, simple and pure
Love the first stanza – so beautifully romantic
you know when you first encounter something that seems too good to be true, but is true.. it’s like you’re in dream. there is a mist 🙂
“like the ageless mist
with its hue?” Very powerful.
when there is a mystery, i imagine a mist of green ..
very apt words.
profound piece.
A++
thanks, jingle…
Remember that last precious moment when time stood still? I enjoyed the way only the best moment is held tightly, not any wrongs.
it’s honestly true. it’s what i remember most. not the bad or ugly. it’s the one last beautiful moment…
This poem is quite as dear as the person whom you obviously cherish. Well done. I especailly like this one. It resonates.
yes, and always will cherish… glad it resonates. it’s very pure
Something about remembering one last moment before kinetic energy between two people dissipates seems both hopeful and mournful at the same time. Tough feat to accomplish with so few words. You have a wonderful poetic voice. Always wonderful to find something like this amidst the detritus of a Sunday night. Great post!
crb.
thank you for your kindness… i try to portray the more subtle feelings with few words. i’m glad it touched you..
INTERESTING AND LOVELY. HONESTLY, I BUY THIS IDEA OF YOURS. WOAH
😉 it’s a nice idea..
Beautiful words to keep a beautiful memory…
yes, a beautiful memory
Beautiful in its fragility Robin, nice twist and change of mood. Thanks for sharing
love is fragile, yes…
This is so beautiful and magical! Moved me deeply… Almost crying! Thanks for sharing… 🙂
… me too. tears create beautiful words, don’t they
Lovely poem..we all wish to be remembered in our special way..you brought this out so well…
thanks .. yes we do 😉
impressive and light! here’s my potluck for this week: http://fiveloaf.wordpress.com/2010/08/04/here-for-you/
thanks… your comments mean a lot
So very romantic, Robin!
(And yes, in fact, I AM a dream come true… or was that a nightmare? LOL!)
😉
I stand to be corrected, but I felt as though there were two voices in the poem. If so, you brought it out brilliantly.
It is also a very comforting poem… nostalgic.
I loved it.
absolutely… i try to speak with two voices often in my writing 🙂 glad you enjoyed…
I could feel the arms wrapped around me…
Beautifully sweet. Lovely!
i’m glad… 😉
Lovely. I especially like the line “you are the wind that keeps me moving.” The movement part…being propelled and compelled. Sometimes that is what we need. And resting against that support. Yummy.
~Cloaked Monk
http://cloakedmonk.com/2011/01/23/eternity/
yes, wind is mysterious… in all its forms. thanks for your comments….
I just loved this piece… reminded me of a time in my life when just being beside a particular soul was sufficient enough.
yes, just being beside a particular soul is sufficient enough 🙂 thanks for that comment
Oh, I’m swooning! Your words make me feel like my husband’s whispering sweet nothings in my ear! I love, love, love this!
perfect 😉
beautiful beyond petty words. your poems truly are magical.
thank you.. i try to find the magic..